Husband Goals in a Crowded House

The family is an amazing combination of happiness, fear, exhilaration, and, at times, unabridged worry. Wife, kids, jobs, practices, school functions, appointments, and anything else that likes to crop its unexpected head up in our day-to-day is a lot to juggle.

It’s what being a Dad is all about.

There was a time when we were married and only married. We were husband with our wife. Before the kids, dogs, and all the other loveliness we were considered DINKS: Dual Incomes No Kids.

Now, please don’t get me wrong. I love my son; he’s the most important thing in my life, but there was a time when all my attention went toward my spouse. We were two peas in a pod with no other responsibilities. It was a one way perspective.

Yes, we still need to take on our family responsibilities, but our wives are family, too. As a husband I feel like we need to act on our relationship, to keep our marriage in focus, and to cultivate that partner-centered feeling again.

We can’t forget each other. We get wrapped up in the tangles of the everyday at warp speed barely hanging on with each day feeling like the last with little memory of what just passed. Like two ships speeding past each other in the light of day we only get a proverbial glimpse of our wives.

Do more without praise

We must rise to the challenge. No matter what our day was like, what stressors we endured, and what our energy levels are we need to be the husband she married. We need to keep at the forefront of our minds the fact that we asked them.

Don’t keep score, don’t entertain jealousy, and don’t seek praise. Do without any expectation of return. It’s not a competition, it’s a selfless, committed relationship worthy of our best.

I am not immune to fault or perfect. This is a call for me, too. This is a reminder for me to keep the marriage strong and do my part expecting nothing in return.

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